Musings from the Road

While on the road, running the most greuling incentive travel program I've ever encountered.....

Ways to Charm Me

1. Free airport Wi-Fi. Only thing good about McCarran International
2. Egg sandwiches on ciabatta bread. Okay, another good thing about LAS.
3. Chocolates on my pillow. Why is this a dying art?
4. 3pm yogurt parfaits from Danny with the beautiful eyes. One of the many good things about the Ritz-Carlton Lake Las Vegas.
5. Let the extra 3 lbs in my suitcase slip by without the extra fee.

Ways to annoy me

1. Fine. Take 15 minutes to situate your stupid carry on before security, you anal, OCD bastard.
2. Eat the whole pastrami and saurkraut sandwich as soon as we sit down on the airplane. Then fart all the way to Las Vegas from New York.
3. Dress like a cowboy (men), gangsta (white guys from Iowa) or a hooker (all women). It's Vegas, after all. Seriously. That's what you wear to Vegas. It's in the handbook.
4. NEEEED to be off the shuttle before me even though you're 7 people behind me. You smarmy, weasly little cowboy, you.
5. Question my ability to do my job, even though I've been doing it since you were in junior high, blondie.

Whew. Time to go home. Good thing there's Wi-Fi at the airport!